There are some relationships that in the beginning are so incredible that we think they may be the one we have been searching for. And than a few months later (or less) the world comes crashing down and we realize that the both of you just don’t mesh and you just can’t seem to see yourself living and being with them for the rest of your lives.
That is when you have to start thinking about breaking up. It is never a fun thing for anyone (on either end of the breakup). If the person you are breaking up with has a sweet nature – than that will make it quite difficult. You need to be brave and understand that what you are doing is for the best even if it upsets the other person. In time they will understand that it was for the best.
What you need to do to make things easier for the both of you is to break up with them the right way. You need to use tact, be gentle, and don’t skirt around the truth. Here are some important ways of breaking up the right way.
1. Don’t avoid the truth – Be honest and tell them exactly why you two are not right for each other. If you leave things up in the air they are going to be wondering what happened for weeks to come – which is unfair for them. You want them to be able to get over you as fast as they can.
2. Don’t lie about the reason – If you are breaking up with them because you found someone else that you connect with than tell them. You both have friends that may eventually find out the truth. You don’t want them to have trust issues with their next relationship.
3. Break up with them in person – Unless you are in a long distance relationship than make sure you break it over the phone while talking to them. Don’t text them and don’t leave a message. Breaking up with someone over the phone (in anyway) is unfair to the other person and will blindside them. When you do it in person you can ease them into it and they will tell (by the look on your face) that something is about to happen. Give them a chance and do it in person.
4. Don’t prolong the breakup – The day you truly discover that you are not meant to be together and you feel that you were not meant to be than you need to break up as soon as possible. If you prolong it than you will begin to act and look upset and uncomfortable around them all the time. This forces them to try to do everything they can to make you feel better – which makes you more frustrated at them because you start to think they are being needy.
5. Be Gentle – Remember to be nice and kind to them while you are explaining your reasons. Don’t be defensive and abusive. If they get defensive understand that they are reacting out of sadness and that you should give them the benefit of the doubt. Let them grieve – but make sure nothing gets out of hand. Only be aggressive if they are taking it too far and are trying to get you back when you have made it clear that it won’t work.